1. Grace, mercy, and peace to you from
God our Heavenly Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Dear Alexanna and Andrew. There’s an apocryphal story about Adam and
Eve that pertains to our readings from God’s Word today. According to the
story, one day Adam worked into the early evening in the Garden of Eden, not
realizing in that pleasant environment that the sun had begun to set and that
he was late for dinner. After arriving
home Adam encountered an irritated wife standing in the doorway. Eve said to
him accusingly, “Adam, where have you
been? Have you been out with another woman?” Adam replied, “Don’t be silly, Eve. I couldn’t have been
out with another woman. There’s no other woman, you’re the only woman for me.”
Eve couldn’t argue with her husband’s logic, but neither could she deny her
feelings. So she waited until Adam fell asleep soundly that night and then she
counted his ribs.
2. If you asked me to summarize in one
word the purpose for which God gives a woman to a man and a man to a woman, the
word I would choose is the word love. In
fact, that’s the theme for the sermon today, my prayer for you Alexanna and
Andy not only today, but the rest of your marriage as husband and wife is that
you would, “Abide in Jesus’ Love.” God gives people to people in order that they
may love one another. There’s another word that, for all practical purposes,
means the same as love. That is the word serve. God gives people to people so
that they may serve one another.
3. On a day such as today, I doubt
that the word I chose to describe God’s intention for you surprises you. Love
is in the air in this building. The two of you look at each other lovingly. The
music is lovely, the flowers are beautiful, your families are supportive, and
your friends and family don’t look bad either. The setting is peaceful, like being
in the Garden of Eden. You’re surrounded by signs and symbols and feelings of
love. It’s enough to make you think that loving each other for the rest of your
lives will be very easy.
4. But, the Scriptures, speak not of
sentimental or emotional love but of a love that’s intentional and self-giving.
In the Epistle today, St. Paul taught the Corinthians to practice
self-sacrificing love. “He wrote of a
love that’s patient and kind, not jealous or boastful, neither arrogant nor
rude. “[Love] does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;
it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth” (1 Cor
13:5–6). Paul urges us to love one another with a strong love that “bears all things, believes all things, hopes
all things, endures all things” (v 7).
5. In the same way, the Gospel from
John 15 calls us to abide in Jesus’ love.
Jesus says in John 15:12, “This is
my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” Jesus’ love was anything but sentimental. It
was the love of tough decisions that drove him to wrestle against the powers of
the devil, that tempted him to forego the cross and to serve himself rather
than die for your sins, for mine, and for the sins of the whole world. The
Savior’s love committed him wholeheartedly to doing his Father’s will, which
included the cross, there to die the death that we deserve because of our sins,
all for us and our salvation. To love others as Christ has loved us, we must
offer the most we have to give: our entire life.
6. Andrew, I hope you know that Alexanna
isn’t going to be as easy to love every day of your marriage as she is today. One
morning you’re going to roll over in bed and remember the disagreement you had
the day before. You will risk opening just one eye as you look at your wife
lying next to you, and you will ask, “Lord,
is this the woman you gave to me on the day of my marriage? Is this the woman
with whom you want me to spend the rest of my life? Do I really have to love
her just as Christ loved me and his entire Bride, the Church, and gave himself
up for her on the cross? Do I really have to sacrifice myself for her?” It’s
not going to be as easy to love her that morning as it is this afternoon.
7.
Alexanna, your husband, too, isn’t going to
be as easy to love every day of your marriage as he is today. One morning you’re
going to look beyond the bed to the pile of crumpled laundry he has left lying
on the floor instead of in the hamper, and you’re going to say, “Lord, in all of your mixing and matching of
husbands and wives, are you certain this is not more of a mix than a match? Are
you certain this is the man with whom you want me to spend the rest of my life?
Do I really have to follow those words of Jesus, ‘This is my commandment, that
you love one another as I have loved you’ (Jn 15:12)”?
8.
Sooner
or later, you’re going to hurt each other and disappoint each other. You will
think the unkind thought and speak the hurting word. Then Satan will tempt you
to turn away from each other and seek an easier solution than extending to each
other the forgiveness you both need to make your relationship whole again. Where can you find the strength you will need
to resist Satan at such times? How will you be able to keep the vows you are
making to each other today? How will you find the humility and grace to forgive
and sacrifice over and over?
9.
The
answer to those questions is in the words of Jesus immediately before the
Gospel for today. Before giving his commandment that we should love one
another, Jesus said, “I am the vine; you
are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much
fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing” (Jn 15:5). Alexanna and Andrew, the ability for the
two of you to abide with one another as husband and wife comes from abiding in
Jesus Christ your Savior.
10.
God
says in His Word that your marriage makes you one flesh with each other; Jesus
became flesh not only to dwell among us, but also to give his flesh for our
life, and to live in us in such fashion that we’re never alone. As husband and
wife, you are not in your marriage relationship alone. You are one, not only
with each other, but with your Savior Jesus Christ. The Old Testament lesson from Ecclesiastes
4:9-12 says it well, “9Two are
better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. 10For
if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he
falls and has not another to lift him up! 11Again, if two lie
together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? 12And
though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a
threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Just
like a rope of three strands isn’t easily broken, Jesus today is committing
Himself to your marriage, as He unites you today as husband and wife, He will
keep your marriage strong, if you abide in His love!!!
11.
When
emotional love fails you, then cling to your Baptism, through which you have
put on the Lord Jesus and have received the benefit of his life, death, and
resurrection. Because of your Baptism, sin isn’t your master; Jesus is. You can
affirm in words and actions the love of Christ, which is the will of God for
your life together as husband and wife. When
you’re tempted to turn away from each other, recall what happens when you come
to the Lord’s Table to receive Christ’s body and blood. Here the life of the
Vine flows into us branches, so that he remains in us and we in him. The body
and blood of Jesus give you the forgiveness of your sins and the power to
forgive each other, just as God, for Christ’s sake, forgives you.
12.
As
if this were not enough, I have more good news for you today. Paul’s Letter to
the Ephesians tells us to be subject to each other out of reverence for Christ.
After addressing himself to husbands and wives, telling them how each is to
serve the other, he quoted those beautiful words from Genesis in Ephesians
chapter 5: “Therefore a man shall leave
his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one
flesh.” Then Paul adds, “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it
refers to Christ and the church” (Eph 5:31–32). Your Baptism into Jesus and
your reception of his Supper unite you not only to Jesus, but also to the whole
communion of saints. There’s great power in the fact that you are not the only
branches connected to the vine of Jesus Christ; there are many others connected
to him as well from whom you can draw strength and support.
13.
One
of the greatest mistakes most Americans make about marriage is considering it
to be a private affair. I want you to know that what is taking place here today
is not simply a matter between you two. Your marriage belongs first of all to
God, who created you, redeemed you, and gave you to each other. It belongs to
your parents, who have invested themselves in you and sustained you to this
moment. It belongs to your friends, who honor you by their presence. It belongs
to your congregation and to me, your pastor. And I pledge to you, no matter
where you are or where I am, if ever there is anything I can do to help your
marriage, you can call on me. I will be available to you and do all I can to
help you keep the vows you make today.
14.
Alexanna
and Andrew, if you live together in Christ’s love and stay connected to him,
his promise to you is that your marriage will bear fruit. I’m confident that
the most important guest attending your wedding today—Jesus—will remain a
welcomed person in your marriage, and so your marriage will be a blessing to
both of you, to the community in which you live, to the place where you work,
to your congregation, and to our world. Together as you abide in Jesus’ love, you will not only be one forever, you will
also be one for good. Amen.
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